Success Lessons From Falling Down

The first lesson beginners in Judo learn is how to fall over without hurting themselves too much. They also learn how to fall in a way which allows them to get up again very quickly and continue fighting or 'playing' Judo. Only later in their training do they learn how to throw other people to the ground and choke them to submission.

It is assumed from the start that Judo players will inevitably experience some failure or falling over. Their opponent, like life in general, will throw them down heavily from time to time. They need to land with as little damage as possible and get going again at once.

They will never attain success in Judo or anything else until they learn to fall down and then get up without giving up. Judo players are not resigning themselves to defeat; they are preparing themselves for all out battle in which they know they will fail many times on the way to eventual victory.

I am no judo expert but I have had the good fortune to teach my own martial arts lessons close to the training halls of Brian Jacks, the legendary British Judo champion, and have learned much from watching and listening to him and his dad.

When he trained in Japan, before a lesson even started, he had to do fifteen hundred somersaults in the air before landing on his back so that he became an expert at breaking his fall after a heavy throw. Learning how to fall or 'fail' taught Brian Jacks how to win. He became and still is a legend in Judo.

A key lesson, then, from Judo is to accept the fact that life will regularly knock us down and we will make mistakes frequently. We have to break the fall as much as possible and then resume life as normal. If we wait until we are so perfect that we will never fall over or be thrown down, we will never ever make a start at anything.

Recently, I have become an expert at falling and the other lessons it can teach. In the last year or so, I have put my foot through the attic roof, slipped off the attic ladder, fallen onto some paving blocks, fallen backwards into a thorn bush, crashed head first into a pile of chairs and fallen out of bed in my sleep!

I won't bore you with all the details but will mention some of the useful life lessons I learned from this extensive and varied experience!

Tread carefully when you are not sure of your ground. Most attics and attic ladders have dodgy areas where your foot can easily go straight through as did mine last year. Fortunately, I was treading gingerly so I was able to recover easily.

My neighbour was not so fortunate when he put his foot in a local pothole. He tried to bear the weight on his single standing leg but the strain ripped the quadriceps of his standing leg away from his knee cap area. He has had to have holes inserted into his knee caps, so that tendons can pull his muscles back to their proper place. He has born all this with amazing courage and cheerfulness and is even talking about getting back to his favourite sport - bowling - within a few short months.

Falls or failures can have horrendous consequences like the above. If you are investing in a new company which you are not sure about, invest small. I lost 27,000 investing in a foreign company that turned out to be fraudulent. If I had trodden more carefully, the loss would have been limited to about 5,000 pounds.

A few weeks ago, I tried to evade the minor discomfort of walking through a puddle and getting my feet wet. I slipped as I tip toed round the puddle and fell backwards into a thorn bush. I ended up with punctured skin and wet and muddy clothes.

In life, in general, accepting minor discomforts, is one way to avoid major ones. Doing daily situps may mean some discomfort but it will help you or me avoid the major discomfort of having a balloon belly. Walk straight through that puddle and get your feet wet. You could end up avoiding the indignity of the thorn bush!

A couple of weeks ago I was doing a knife drill with one of my students. I launched myself towards him with a fake knife. He skipped out of the way at speed. I missed him and fell forwards. I landed heavily on my knee caps and stopped my progress forward by head butting a large pile of chairs. Blood flowed!

I had been over enthusiastic. Enthusiasm is normally a great quality but it can lead to disaster if it is not controlled. Don't get carried away by your first love; you could end up married to the wrong person!

The religious enthusiast can quite easily find himself in with the wrong crowd. So can the extreme atheist. An over enthusiastic football player can get the red card and be expelled from the playing field. He lets himself and his team down.

Yesterday, I woke up on the floor at 8.30 a.m. I had been dreaming about being part of a large martial arts class of black belts. Everyone was doing the right moves except me!

In my dream, I felt badly humiliated as my rank was higher than most of the others. I remember leaning forward and sideways in my sleep to see what the others were doing. I must have moved physically as I dreamed and rolled out of bed on to the floor.

The 'dream' humiliation of making mistakes in front of a large audience when I should have known better had made me try too hard and lose balance. Even if the situation had been a real one, it would have been no big deal.

Some other members of the class might have had a laugh at my ignorance. In fact, if I had just done my own thing I might have convinced other members of the class that I was right and they were wrong!

I have seen martial artists and even singers get away with glaring mistakes by appearing totally confident that they were doing the right moves or singing the right notes. Confidence can cover up a multitude of errors. I, on the other hand, never established a folk singing career because I was too afraid of hitting the wrong notes.

To sum up: accept the fact that you will fall down and make serious mistakes. Get going even if you risk failure. You can always get up and start again. Learn how to take the "the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune" and keep on fighting rather than retiring into your shell and giving up.

Tread with care when learning new things. A little knowledge can be a dangerous thing. A keen chef can kill off his customers if he does not know for sure which mushrooms to use!

Put up with minor discomforts and you may well avoid major ones. Be careful that your enthusiasms don't blind you to the realities of life and don't worry if you feel you are in a humiliating situation. Confidence or bare faced cheek will often carry you through. Even experts make mistakes. I have seen a squirrel fall out of a tree locally. It just bounced up and carried on with its normal routine.

Start doing whatever you are putting off because you think you might make some mistakes. Who cares? Life is too short. Just get going. Try to avoid or minimize major failures but, if they come, bounce back with resilience and carry on. You will do better next time and, even if you don't, you will be alive instead of hiding in a false fortress of 'perfection'.

Become an expert faller or 'failer' and you may soon be on the fast track to success! Let's experience the shock of failure and of making mistakes and we may soon be on the way to experiencing the relaxing joy of success.

My granddad used to say: "If a thing's worth doing, it's worth doing well!" Yes, there is much truth in what he says. Doing something well is fun and satisfying.

But if you wait till you can do it well, you may never do it. I prefer the saying that: "If a thing's worth doing, it's worth doing badly, first!"

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